I don’t go walking in my sleep….but I’m awake. Usually at or around 3:30am. Sometimes for hours on end. Usually just to drift off to sleep within 30 minutes of my alarm.

It’s frustrating, exhausting and maddening.

When I’m notably stressed, usually the act of getting up, making a list of things to do or completing a nagging task is enough to alleviate the situation. Most nights, like tonight, are unexplainable.

I have avoided caffeine after noon for years. I’ve tried melatonin. I’ve tried yoga poses, otc sleep aids, sleepy time tea, warm milk and more.

I first encountered insomnia when I lived in Spain. Most nights we went out dancing until the sun came up, but other nights I remember passing the hours on my balcony watching the city sleep.

Tonight I should be exhausted and sleeping soundly. I spent the day sharing the benefits of milk and dairy foods with thousands of consumers at an outdoor festival. It’s something I love to do, but very draining. Instead of enjoying some well deserved rest, I’m chronicling my torment.

I got up, went downstairs and had a snack, snuggled with my dogs, read more of “Beautiful You” (Palahniuk), came back upstairs, snuggled with the cat, checked email, Facebook, PostSecret and then started this post. I’m still wide awake.

In the middle of the night…